It’s hard to speak only of kitchen gadgets for my “Tool of the Month” post as we get closer to November 6 – maybe because at this particular time in the election cycle there are so many tools to choose from. Therefore, I think it only appropriate that I mention Mrs. Chuck Norris who applied a portion of a 1964 Ronald Reagan speech to our current political dynamic, purporting that the United States will plunge into “1,000 years of darkness” if President Obama is re-elected. Toward that end, please hang onto your mortar and pestles, your rolling pins and flints – all wonderful kitchen tools that will work great in the new dark ages of the twenty-first century.
However, if you feel that morality, civility and electricity will somehow survive the electoral process, no matter what the outcome, then I suggest an amazingly resourceful kitchen tool, the grandaddy blender of them all – the Vita-Mix. I know what you’re going to say – they’re ridiculously expensive, however, this is a case of ‘you get what you pay for.’ This is the machine Jamba Juice uses for their smoothies; the device that gives Baskin Robbins’ milk shakes their creamy texture. And for the high brow crowd, the Vita-Mix is an officially approved product of the Culinary Institute of America.
I got one with two separate bowls – one for liquids and one for grinding flours. Running me a hair north of $500, it has a seven year warranty. The model just for liquids will set you back around $375 from Costco where we watched a demo man toss in peppers, cabbage, tomatoes, carrots, corn chips, beans and a few other ingredients to produce a steaming tortilla soup. Among other things, you can also make ice cream, sauces, dressings, marinades, sorbet and pudding. It’s a new toy, so I plan on producing lots of wonderful concoctions.
I know it’s a lot to spend, but you’ll love it, plus Christmas and Chanukah are just around the corner. And thank God, so is the election. For the record, I really didn’t mean to take sides, so I’d like to officially apologize to my mortar and pestle, my rolling pin and the flint inside my fly-fishing vest. They’re great tools, too.